Knives and Searches

I've been a bit lax writing for a while, but here's a story to make things up.

Once upon a time there was a smoked meat product that had grown hard and cruel with age. It's fats had gone yellow, it's flesh black. It proceeded to hatch a plot with a vicious sharp knife to make a break for freedom, fame and fortune.
This unsavory duo crossed the path of a poor soul, poor in that he was a job-seeker in a time of recession with an odd sociologically coloured education quite unsuited to the basic demands of a market economy and real life. True to their plot, they callously tried to maim and wound this poor soul. The meat product slipped treachorously, taking the knife's blade deep into said soul's flesh.
Alas, the knife turned traitor again. The soul recaptured the meat product and finger-wound well-bandaged proceeded to sever the meat product into small pieces and consume them all, to the very last.
Thus ended the tale of the old meat product.

:)

Thought: Those Who Enjoy [Be]moaning

"The Average life expectancy for men and women in the US has shot up pfrom 46.3 and 48.3 years, respectively, in 1900 to 74.1 and 79.5 in the year 2000. In the EU, the average life expectancy in 2002 was 75.5 years for men and 81.6 years for women, an increase of roughly thirty-three years since the beginning of the twentieth century. Those who enjoy bemoaning their fate must acknowledge that on average they can do so for far longer and in far greater comfort than ever before." (McMahon 2006, 466)

Draw: Sheep Titty

Titties are used for making milk and cheese and other dairy products.
Yum.

Draws: Hail Jessie!

'nuff said.

Draw: Worm

Tempting, isn't it?

Draws: Inefficiency

Apparently the average employee checks his or her email account 70
times in the course of a regular workday. That's amazing! It's almost
like a humming bird hovering, or something. That's approximately once
every 7 minutes! Add in how often the aforementioned employee makes a
phonecall, checks twitter and facebook, and you have an argument for
introducing 4 hour, no computer workdays!

Draw: Flamethrowers

A nuclear powered flamethrower would radically alter the balance of
fire in any trench warfare situation. Why not?